The dramatic second implosion of As I Lay Dying that performed out final yr was a quite disturbing ordeal. One after the other, all members of the metalcore band sans vocalist Tim Lambesis all exited the band, with virtually all cryptically citing their morals or perception programs being challenged. Within the wake of that, rumors of infidelity and spousal abuse started to flow into on-line, nonetheless, Tim Lambesis‘ spouse on the time publicly refuted the allegations of home violence.
In early November, Lambesis went on to challenge this public assertion, providing a obscure clarification of the occasions that transpired, whereas speaking his intentions to as soon as once more rebuild the band. A number of weeks later, leaked residence safety footage of Lambesis and his spouse started to flow into on-line, exhibiting the couple in heated discussions. In these clips, Tim was discovered to develop into extraordinarily agitated, pacing, hitting himself repeatedly, and fervently yelling.
In a follow-up assertion to the footage, Tim accused his spouse of assault and verbal abuse throughout their three-year relationship. He additionally indicated that he had initiated a home violence investigation towards her, claiming he had a number of movies of her assaulting him, amongst different issues.
He additionally recommended that the leaked footage was in ‘retaliation’ for him serving her with divorce papers a day previous to the leaks. That assertion additionally discovered him describing his erratic conduct within the leaked footage as being ” “nervousness crammed reactions and defenses.”
In mid-January of this yr, Tim went on to give this interview, providing his aspect of occasions that led to the breakup of the band and opening up on his psychological well being struggles. Two days afterwards, footage of Tim appearing bodily abusive in direction of his canine leaked on-line. Later that day, his now estranged spouse Dany Lambesis denied numerous allegations made towards her by Tim, whereas additionally accusing him of varied indiscretions.
The above-mentioned footage of the alleged animal abuse has been again within the information this week, resulting from over 69,000 supporters signing a petition to have authorities become involved over the incidents. Nonetheless, now one in every of Tim‘s former bandmates in the latest incarnation of As I Lay Dying has publicly spoken out, offering precise particulars on the alleged incident that led to the group’s 2024 implosion.
The band’s former guitarist Ken Susi has spoken at size on the topic with the BREWtally Talking Podcast as a part of a two-hour dialogue, half of which is devoted to his time in As I Lay Dying. That whole episode is on the market now under.
Initially addressing the matter and why he’s chosen to talk out about it publicly now, Susi supplied [transcribed by theprp.com]:
“… Tim being a litigious individual, you realize, and silencing everyone across the band within the explicit state of affairs that we’re all in, it’s clearly clear. The individuals which can be near him and who will not be talking, and I feel the followers, it’s form of bizarre why individuals are not speaking, However in my view I feel it’s unacceptable for Tim to go on podcasts along with his associates and make false claims about how the band broke up.
I suppose like, imagine what you need, however my model of what occurred completely doesn’t align with principally what he’s been on the market saying and placing out statements about, proper? So I actually don’t personally need to get right into a backwards and forwards with Tim Lambesis, and I actually don’t need to reply per se to what he stated within the breakup and all that stuff, it’s simply not what I’m right here to do.
However I feel the band simply discovered ourselves able the place we have been primarily endorsing and selling someone with like a historical past… previous accusations and he went to jail and all that stuff and he did what he did.
However like after his incarceration, it was virtually like I did form of see this coming. In my view, he formulated this like virtually actuality TV, you realize, persona for his fanbase of like him portraying himself as his man of redemption or rehabilitation.
And it actually gave these individuals that actually do imagine in that this like sense of, ‘I can get behind this man and and do the factor that you realize, that that he says that he’s. And I can overcome my, the issues that I’ve endured in my life,’ and like giving individuals hope. However to be completely sincere with you, it’s as I stated, it’s virtually, like well-crafted and effectively thought out. You recognize, I actually don’t imagine in my view, I actually don’t imagine it’s an actual factor in his world. However perhaps he can communicate to that.”
Susi would later go on to say:
“However, going again to the band, numerous troubling points form of surfaced inside the band in his private life — effectively, surfaced in his private life — but in addition with the band, main the band into it. And we have been simply principally supporting someone coping with critical issues. And we have been unaware of how critical these issues have been on the time.
And after we figured, when the band really, you realize, it revealed himself and the band figured it out, that’s when, we actually realized that… I imagine, and we imagine, that he, Tim, was, in want {of professional} assist. And it was one thing that we weren’t in a position to present or outfitted to offer to him. ‘Trigger we’re not like therapists and we’re not relationship specialists. We’re, we’re none of that.
We’re simply band dudes, like trying to play gigs and have a great time. And we have been actually form of, numerous us felt lots remorse after we discovered precisely what was occurring, when the band evaporated. It was principally… what I’m attempting to say is it needed to cease.”
After relaying that he had a longtime relationship with Lambesis courting again a long time from touring collectively and operating in comparable circles previous to becoming a member of As I Lay Dying, Susi went on to say:
I’ve, completed a number of excursions with [As I Lay Dying, when Susi was in Unearth] and at these occasions, I all the time thought Tim was a great individual. And there’s lots of people that say that in that point.
And I used to be prepared to face behind someone at that time as a result of there’s layers of friendship and years of friendship and conversations that you’ve got backstage and assembly households and doing issues.
And, you realize, the experiences you might have with these individuals which can be form of like, ‘You recognize what? This man tousled.’ And I’m right here to say, yeah, these individuals which can be saying that stuff on-line are 1000% proper. However you simply don’t know the complete story.
And I’m saying that they’re technically proper. I ought to have recognized higher. However then once more, I’m the kind of individual, that I might quite give someone a second likelihood. The second likelihood is the one, proper?
And in the event you fail me from there, I might quite have given someone a second likelihood than to not give them an opportunity in any respect, as a result of that’s not how I’m made, you realize? I might quite simply form of say I imagine this individual may very well be rehabilitated.
I favored this individual earlier than they have been incarcerated. I’ve numerous associates that went to jail and received out and are stellar individuals.
So if I miss a possibility or, you realize, or if I don’t help someone in that point, then I’m a jerk.”
After revealing that he reached out to former As I Lay Dying guitarist Nick Hipa previous to changing him within the band, Susi defined that Hipa gave him the gist of what he was strolling into. As such, talking on this podcast, Susi relayed he “wasn’t dumb” to among the issues lurking inside As I Lay Dying.
When it was offered by the podcast’s host that Tim had no less than positively impacted some individuals along with his journey and that some occasions good issues can outweigh the band, Susi went on to say:
“On this explicit use case state of affairs, in my view, the dangerous issues outweigh the nice issues tremendously. And it isn’t one thing that I’m going to endorse, help, condone. Like, I don’t need to be part of something that he has occurring sooner or later. I don’t need to be associates with him.
He’s… there is no such thing as a room for reconciliation between the 2 of us. I don’t respect what he’s completed and I’ll by no means respect it. There’s very particular issues that occurred in my own residence that I’m not pleased with. There’s no quantity of fine that he can do shifting ahead to vary my opinion. And that’s for me.
We will all sit right here on-line and say, ‘Oh, I’ve a buddy and he went to jail and he did effectively, and blah, blah. Effectively guess what? On this state of affairs, that’s not the case.”
Later within the dialog, Susi shared:
“There was a lot dangerous footage that popped up on-line and I used to be, I feel the entire band was like, ‘holy crap, that is what was occurring.’ Like we had no concept, however we’re glad we walked away form of form of vibe.
It’s like for these individuals within the remark part being, ‘Oh, you realize, this man didn’t hit that canine too arduous’ or, ‘This man didn’t freak out that tough’ or ‘He barely touched her.’ And I’m form of like, how a lot do you’re keen on this band?
As a result of the fellows within the band don’t find it irresistible as a lot as you do at this level. You recognize what I’m saying? Prefer it’s time to cease. And the one manner I might, me personally, Ken Susi, would ever help that exact challenge is that if he wasn’t part of it. Apart from that, I’m completed.”
Later within the dialog, talking on the kinship he felt with different members of the band who served in its most up-to-date incarnation, together with Ryan Neff and his former Unearth bandmate Nick Pierce, Susi said:
“…We have been prepared. We have been dedicated to this. We have been undoubtedly excited and dedicated. And that was all ruined. It was all fucking ruined for no fucking motive. Effectively, not, I’m not saying… no, there’s a motive. There’s no motive for the dangerous actions.
After which within the one, the well-known factor that I say to everyone is all Tim actually needed to do is get out of jail and simply scream to a fucking mic and be cool. And that was arduous.”
Expressing his frustration relating to Lambesis‘s actions and blowing second probabilities and past [Lambesis was previously sentenced to prison in a murder-for-hire scheme involving his ex-wife back in 2014,] Susi supplied:
“This isn’t even his second likelihood. That is his third, 4th, fifth… So these guys, you realize, we deserved. We did all the fitting issues. We have been within the shit. We fucking performed the exhibits. We we, we received the acceptance of the fanbase once more.
The entire band simply had a mass exodus and we, the second iteration of the band, recovered that, clearly with the staff in place and it labored. Individuals have been liking us. Individuals have been giving us exhibits. They have been asking us again on festivals. It wasn’t simply Tim. and Phil [Sgrosso, ex-As I Lay Dying guitarist] stated it, ‘step down, depart.’ Like please, have you learnt what the followers need?
And you realize, if individuals are going to touch upon this, do the followers need to see a band with out him? I don’t know. However to be sincere with you, I feel it will be good to, to see what that might be. However he’d by no means give it up over his useless physique. He wouldn’t, he feels he’s completed no improper.
He can go get fucking YouTube guitar gamers and drummers and shit and and make them signal NDAs or do regardless of the fuck he’s going to do. Have at it, dude. I simply refuse to assume anybody’s going to observe that after, the 4th fifth strike on you. They’ll’t love the band that a lot. There’s there’s a restrict to those issues.”
Susi additionally went on to vent his frustration on how Lambesis seemingly dismissed the varied members that exited the group final fall. That is additionally the place Susi outlined his aspect of an incident alleged to have taken place in his residence that led to the group disintegrating final yr:
“I’m not going to defame anyone, however I’m going to exit and say that Tim, personally along with his statements after the band, have simply depicted me and the opposite bandmates as unstable… It defamed my character. The man wrote one thing alongside the traces of like ‘Phil stop, stop later, and the band took Phil‘s took aspect and others rushed to statements when once they have been fearful about rumors that have been circulating.’
Like that was on November 4th, proper. He wrote that on his on the non-public As I Lay Dying web page to a fan that was commenting about stuff. That was extremely incorrect. I feel the 25 years that I’ve been in bands, I’ve been fairly fucking vocal and sincere to individuals… I wouldn’t stop over a rumor. Christ. I used to be within the band with a man that loads of rumors circulated about. However the factor is these rumors have been really fucking true.
If you wish to know what precisely occurred and why the band broke up is as a result of we have been at Metalfest and we had the best fucking time in my kitchen. We had all of the the all of the band, all of the members, all of the crew, everyone and some individuals have been staying at a lodge. After which me, being a great host, after the competition.
Now, thoughts you, him [Tim] and his spouse, they weren’t they weren’t vibing on tour. You recognize issues… We have been not sure if his spouse was even going to return to this quick weekend of exhibits, However I’m going to say, they have been staying in a lodge down the road and I supplied, I stated, ‘Hey, you’re going to go get a tattoo. My spouse works from residence. I received to go to Fishman. In case your spouse desires to only chill all day, my spouse and your spouse are associates. You’re welcome to only keep right here and save the cash. And you should utilize one in every of our vehicles. You don’t should hire a automotive.’
Like simply go do your factor. However what ended up taking place is, my spouse and I are having a child. She’s placing a bassinet collectively proper now as past the past the display screen. However we [had] simply introduced to my entire household that we’re having a child. We received my mom crying, my father crying. Tim‘s spouse is witnessing this, taking video in our home, it was a joyous event the day after Metalfest.
After which inside 2-3 hours later, there was like an incident the place now thoughts you, I’m simply going to choose up the, I’ll choose up the fucking digicam proper now. I received these enormous honking safety cameras everywhere in the home, and a label on the entrance door saying you’re being filmed 24/7, proper?
And this man like comes into my home in the midst of the evening, corners his spouse in my kitchen and spits in her face. After which retracts 4 or 5 steps again and has some sort of episode, which I’ve by no means seen out of someone earlier than in my whole life.
After which begins screaming and operating round my home for assist. And it alarmed my spouse. She wakened and he or she’s like, ‘What’s occurring?’ And I’m like, ‘I’ve heard him scream for assist earlier than.’ I’m going to go see what’s occurring.
However finally, I’m not 20-years-old. I’m not going to show a blind eye to home violence. I’m not going to show a blind eye to love improper conduct. You recognize, when shit occurs, you fucking deal with it. And in that state of affairs, I didn’t know what occurred. I separated them, I introduced them all the way down to my studio. I requested him particularly what the fuck is happening.
And I, is there something I have to know? And he was identical to, ‘Oh my marriage’, this and that. And I’m like, ‘cool.’ I’m going upstairs. I requested Dany what’s occurring. She tells me the reality.
I really pull up the digicam footage in entrance of her and I see precisely what was stated. He spit on me. He threw a match. I used to be attempting to calm him down the entire 9. And to be completely sincere with you, that’s what fucking occurred.
Afterward, you realize, he tried to vary. I went again downstairs. I stated, ‘I’m disillusioned in you.’ And he’s like, ‘I didn’t spit on her face. I spit at her toes.’ And I’m like, ‘Why are you spitting in my home on the whole?’ Should you’re going to lie about it, you realize? And the sincere to God reality is, you’re not going to insult me. I requested him to depart instantly. He left. And at that time, the remaining is historical past.
If Tim, desires me to love… Once I stop the band, he despatched a message by way of his spouse, by way of his spouse’s cellphone, saying he would sue me if I ever launch that footage as a result of he didn’t know — he was filmed with out his consent, or he was posting up like, Dany would sue me, his spouse.
However like, finally I’m not fucking scared. I’ve the receipts. With Tim‘s permission, if you wish to examine if I’m a reputable supply, if you wish to see if I’m a upstanding individual, I’ll launch it. If you need me to launch it, that’s high-quality. Tim, like I’ve no downside with it.
However I’m not going to take a seat right here and allow you to say issues like, ‘Oh, Phil left the band.’ Otherwise you have been actually distant from the band and you realize, everybody was like attempting to drag you again in, however you have been simply on this place and blah, blah. You, you realize, you’re making a lie. You’re making a lie for the fanbase. And it makes me look dangerous. It makes the fellows look dangerous. You probably did one thing improper. You must come clean with it.
And to be sincere with you, I despatched the video to Phil and I simply stated, ‘Phil, you’re the different like working officer on this band. You’re technically HR. You recognize, I desire you don’t share this with anyone.’ However I simply stated, ‘I’ve to stop the band. I’m out of right here. I don’t need to take care of such a shit.’ After which I additionally stated that we had like, you realize, cash on the road for a tour and pyro and all this different shit.
I stated, I’ll end the tour, I’ll do the European Tour, so long as like this man has assist or he goes to get assist, you realize? I actually didn’t need to be part of the challenge anymore, however I did perceive like how a lot cash was on the road for these guys. It’s a giant funding while you go abroad with scrims and pyro and all this different crap, and the deposits which can be laid down.
And I didn’t need to depart them excessive and dry, although the the severity of the difficulty was like so critical, however I used to be prepared to see by way of that. However by the point it went into the As I Lay Dying, like band circle, that’s when issues imploded.
No one wished to be part of it anymore. They didn’t care in regards to the funds. They didn’t care about something. And and that’s actually what went down, you realize, it’s what it’s. What am I going to say? I’m telling the reality. I simply, I simply don’t just like the ‘the band broke up due to communication issues and everybody adopted Phil‘ or, you realize, Tim… Tim actually blew up the excursions that I used to be presupposed to be on, proper? With all of the earnings that I used to be going to make on that. I by no means received paid on royalties for the songs that I did write, or assist write, on the report.
You recognize, he threatens me, clearly, once more, I stated, with a lawsuit, if I speak about or, you realize, ship footage round that he clearly knew as a result of I’ve cameras in my frequent areas and an indication on the entrance door that he’s being filmed. And, you realize, principally mendacity [about me online.]
I’ve been on this enterprise for 20 years, proper? 20 years, and really longer than him. And to painting the band and us, like for leaving the best way he did. I simply don’t assume it’s cool. And it’s what it’s.
Simply don’t abuse your spouse in my fucking home and put my integrity on the road. And somebody must say one thing. I don’t. I don’t really feel like that is the.. I didn’t come on the present to to mean to take action. However since we’re within the second, I’m going to fucking say it in your present over anyone else’s as a result of I really like you as an individual, and folks do need to know. Don’t subscribe to one thing that’s not good. However once more, I’ve the receipts.”
